My 12 y/o god son's bandmate just asked me to their school dance. Still he's a better catch than the last one...
PS- did you die? If you did just text "dead" to me, so that I know.
boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
On the bright side, I hit her with the door on the way in
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I'm sad your dog died... Her name is my stripper name.
I don't know how I got here... but I think I'm in a Christian Impact meeting... I'm trying to act as straight as possible. They can sense gay.
I have never heard someone not give a fuck so poetically in my life. I feel like you should be leading men into battle with a speech like that
Don't even start with me. You know damn well if you walked into a bathroom with two girls naked in the shower you would stay too. Regardless how drunk I was or whether or not you were my ride.
I think once you know a guy's chest measurements the stalking has gone too far..
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Don't forget the part about the bar bathroom stumbles.
Oh damn, you're right. I have to include that. You turned off all the lights with your head. That was impressive.
And I'm laying here struggling with the notion that I need to put pants on.
WE HAVE TO LEAVE. I HAVE HAD SEX WITH WAY TOO MANY PEOPLE IN THIS BUS STATION.
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
I took it as a sign from the lord above that she wanted me to creep on these men.
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
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