if your leaving for the weekend then im farting on your pillow
oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
My leg won't stop wagging. It's like it's congratulating my vagina.
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
I am as serious as getting herpes in Mexico...
What do herpes have to do with anything?
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
I just wanted to warn you I have strep throat incase I gave it to that guy we both hooked up with on New Years.
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
Shit. She's still hooking up with some random in the doorway. How do I get out of here?
Well hurry! Everybody is already at McDonalds.
I'm free! Didnt realize how easy it was to crawl out the window.
You jumped into so many bushes for no reason
How many times have we said we'd stop taking Jell-O shots with strangers?
How the hell do you misplace a bag of tacos in a closet?
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
Awake! can you bring me my pants...im under the couch
Is it weird that I'm smoking a cig on my back patio in a sports bra and underwear?
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