sometimes in life you just needs hand puppets
no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
franzia sundays are my new favorite holiday
my mom told me that she didn't count me in the census because im a waste of life anyway.
Got drunk. Then they sung "we didnt start the fire" to my other cousin who accidentally burnt down the house when she was younger.
Its official. Iv'e been kicked out of a bar in every state. I would like to take my job and travel time for allowing this to happen.
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
Walmart at night is scary enough without having to run into people you've slept with
I just tripped out to the Angel of Music from Phantom of the Opera in my car. Wayyyy to high for shuffle right now.
If I have to strap one on and give it to you good, you will not die revirginated. That's friendship.
We're both clumsy. What does this imply for our kids?
Helmets.
GDI YOU HAVE THE GOD OF FUCKING THUNDER'S NUDES AND YOU DIDN'T SHARE
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
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