well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
Worst part of St. Paddy's...me drunkenly crying to a U2 cover band.
Woke up at 4:30am to my little brother shaking me. Apparently I fell asleep naked on my kitchen table waiting for the toaster to pop. 2 years of college completed and i still havent learned my drinking limit...
she left out the fact that she had a kid until she told me not to suck on her tits too hard or milk would come out.
You're barking up the wrong lesbian.
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
No she stopped screaming. Now she's eating popcorn. Off a plate. With a spoon.
You need to come over. I cant get her to stop eating honey mustard straight from the squeeze bottle
This is worse then when all the pharmacists sang me happy birthday while I was buying plan b
Apparently at some point last night someone gave me tequila. There was a few shots left when I woke up so that was breakfast. This is a good birthday
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
I remember puking but I don't remember where. PSA: don't go barefoot around the house
But I did discover that he's totally okay with going down on me while I eat taco bell so that's a plus, right?
I shaved my entire vagina for a man who had the personality of a potato and a C- orgasm. Life is a series of disappointments.
That's when I realized I was probably naked in the wrong bed
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