You know how britney does the hair flip too much in her new videos? Thats me right now
I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
Remind me to tell you the "if you give a mouse a special brownie" story when you get back
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
Don't know how I even got in. I pulled my id out and threw it at the bouncer, and he just picked it up, checked it, and let me in.
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
I cant be sure, but i think ive been drunk in this church before.
I deflowered you on valentines day. I AM THE BEST AT ROMANCE. LOVE ME.
I am descending into that finals week rage fueled by ramen, mountain dew and bad sex is what's up.
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
Please come pick up your twin. She's tap dancing in her underwear and that's not how you want yourself represented.
Randomize