NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
I told him I'm not paying rent anymore because he's seen my boobs.
She might as well just lie down with one of those red "Easy Buttons" next to her
I took both his daughters virginities. There's no way he won't give me a job
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
Yeah things got weird. You ate an entire bag of hotdog buns, then tried to catch a tree on fire with a candle.
Referring to yourself in third person during sex is apparently an instant turn off
this is not the time for floating mt dew and shots of tequila.
Some Russian dude just came up to us and I'm pretty sure he offered his girlfriend to have sex for 80 bucks. Whoever said porn movies were unrealistic.
We were in the middle of a serious discussion about social justice and he pulled sequins out of his teeth and kept talking like nothing had happened.
So I'll bring my machete and we can smoke your shit.
Out of context, that is a hilariously scary message.
When I'm drunk I really like to hold dicks. Like, affectionately.
There may or may not be an ass shaped dent in the hood of my car. All I know is windshield wipers aren't as sturdy as you think to hold onto.
I told him you forbid me to sleep with him so he needs to accept that.
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
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