when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
Fuck. I'm going to pass the savings right on to the strippers. It's trickle down economics.
I usually just read books and meditate to an aquatic soundtrack of sea walrus's mating. But ill choose coors light instead
I gave up yolo and cigarettes for lent. I owe god a sincere apology.
Is buying her a loofah for my house commitment like? I don't wanna give the wrong idea
So if I tell her fire is hot and it will burn her... she's probably just going to keep throwing her vagina at it huh?
I AM OFFERING YOU ALCOHOL AND THE CHANCE TO LET ME SAY FUCK IT TO MY RESPONSIBILITIES. HOW MANY TIMES DOES THIS HAPPEN?!
it is my last wish that my tale be published posthumously as a warning to anyone thinking of eating burger king at nine am
Sorry I sent you a video of a singing reverend last night, I was really high.
She doesn't believe I only want to use you for sex. She has a much higher opinion of me than either of us do.
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
Dipping my sugar cookies in a glass of fireball and creme soda. This is holiday spirit
Don't do it. He's got a dick the size of a baseball bat. You don't want that commitment.
I have to. For the sake of science.
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