can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
dude...I wrote 15 jersey shore quotes on her body. she is going to do the walk of shame with snookie on her forehead.
My co-worker just asked me if i colored my hair. Time to take a shower.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its great to know that you distinguish your relationships on whether you can cum on someone's face
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
I'm hoping he'll tell everyone how great in bed I am. Well, how great in bathroom floor I am.
Hearing them have a conversation is like listening to water buffalo have sex. Awkward and scarring.
I'm ready to sell my soul to the strip club tonight
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
come home. i made deep-fried hotdogs; don't let me die alone.
I want Walter White to make me a bologna sandwich while I'm chained to a support
My brain and heart say thanks but my vagina isn't super pleased with you right now
He started saying the pledge of allegiance so his boner would go down. Merica.
You've slept with someone mentioned in the NY Times, that officially makes you the most famous person I know.
I am serious when I say I think I broke a rib having sex with Kyle. It might be puncturing my lung. No lie. I might die today.
Randomize