just did a line in a complete hula outfit off a chick in a devil costume. do you think hell will be this good?
Dude im not sure whos apartment i woke up in but i just showered here and their shampoo in phenomenal
I was going to clean my house but wine sounded better
i just googled "what is oprah really like?" how do YOU think my night is going?
You just kept yelling "SATAN!" at me every time I walked by
Ive had to apologize to every girl i know today because of you
I sat down with you and helped you write your will last night. I was THAT convinced that you weren't waking up.
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
I just very easily got pretty high off of one bowl of shitty dirt weed. I'm a sad excuse for who I used to be.
Almost threw up on my grandmother as she walked in the house. Had to run to the bathroom and vomit my brains out. Prolly getting taken out of the Will now.
It could be worse. I was dumped by a guy in a kilt after he gave my shoes away on St. Patrick's Day.
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
you know, i'm always afraid you're going to think i only want you for sex because i only text you when i'm horny
speaking of, guess what i'm thinking about
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
i feel as though me waking up and asking her if i went to the hospital was a sign that i was not okay
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