I just saw a man with a full beard and frosted tips
there is no god
I mean she's dancing like an epileptic patato and i'd like to slap her
I sware she could use her own nose as a dildo.
You go to school with some of the ugliest girls I've ever seen... How are you not getting laid?
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
Nope. He totaled my car then moved back to Louisiana to work things out with baby mama. I sure know how to pick em
He told me "it wants a kiss" WHY HAS THIS HAPPENED WITH 2 DIFFERENT PEOPLE.
When you sober up and come in here, I'm in your bed because you pissed on me in mine. So fuck. Off.
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
Yes she was blowing me but I couldnt see her face. The only light was from the sparklers she asked me to hold. I love 4th of July.
For the first time in my life, I may be the most normal person in the room.
Update: I am definitely the most normal person in this room. And the least tattooed.
You took one look at him and said "let's hope I don't remember this tomorrow" then you took another shot and chased it with a beer.. I guess it was a success.
she just kept straddling the railing to the stairs and shouting "come on Seabiscuit, lets win this for America."
I gotta do like a month's worth of catch-up personal hygiene today in prep for Christmas so extended family doesn't ask if I'm depressed.
Randomize
