Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
Just tried to fight the dj at cowboys because he would'nt play freebird. Pick me up now.
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
I could be wrong, but im pretty sure i jumped off the roof after my lighter.
Too bad you can't keep me under your desk. You'd love that wouldn't you? Massages, blowjobs, and I'd be forced to be quiet all day.
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
I'm glad I booty called you last night. It was nice to see you and talk, in between all the sex...
You'd be proud! I didn't lose my id this time... It got confiscated
Ummm, my mojito just spilled on 2 essays as I'm grading. Who says high schoolers have all the fun?
That feeling when you're ready to convert to the religion of whatever god will stop the vomit. Dynamite is illegal.
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
Before we have sex for the first time I would like "eye of the tiger" to be playing to mentally prepare me for what I'm about to endure.
In what world does 'I'm awake' at 2:30 in the morning on a wednesday translate to 'let's fuck' in the span of one text? Where has the romance gone?
At least they took the pillow of my bed before they had sex. My friends are so polite.
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize
