oh my god im such an asshole. i just asked the guitarist of bad religion if he was a scalper.
there is a homeless man oan crack poledancing on a fence... now hes humping it...
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
I just had to take a drug test for my new job. I should have asked them if they could tell me if I were pregnant or not while they were at it and save me the guesswork.
Took it a bit far last night. While leaving his house, I sent myself a text that said, 'you're still pretty"
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
True as that may be, are you coming to the birth of my imaginary child or not?
You will receive a large, large reward, worth much more than the actual phone you are holding, paid not only in cash but in sexual favors, if you return this phone! Please respond if you're interested in cash/sex/or just being a good person. Thanks and hope to hear from you soon!
You threw up? Were you ladylike while you did it? I'm wagering that you were. Like a Disney princess. Like a "Puke Me Pretty" Barbie.
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
I thought that wasn't a thing ever since she showed you her vag on the dance floor
Of the three people getting wasted at this dance competition, im two of them
She found the planted magnum condom..once she figured it out it was too late.
I'm out of prison. Wanna start a band?
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