I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
Peed on my phone. Dried it out in oven. Technology is both a plus and a minus.
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
Sitting here wishing there were men in my life.
me too. too bad ive decided to fill that hole with cookie dough, closing the door to future men one fat cell at a time.
If I remember who won the superbowl tomorrow morning.. I think I'm just going to quit drinking. There really won't be a point anymore
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
your mom just called me and asked me why i'm not in jail with you right now.
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
I broke up with him in the bar & then asked him if he wanted to have a contest to see who gets the most numbers. I say I took that break up well
do you still have a key to my apartment? Without going into too much detail locked myself out naked on the patio, currently using a deck cushion to cover myself so kids walking home from school dont see me
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
If we hadn't just agreed to no commitment, i'd totally propose right now. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
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