If she didn't want me to pass out in her bathroom, then she shouldn't have such a furry rug in there
this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
you left with a lisa lampanelli lookalike... i hope she was atleast funny
shes laying on the floor in a bowl of salsa with her pants half off and she's crying... i dont know what to do...
im afraid if i stop breathing i will turn into a porcupine
Shotgunned a beer while taking a bath.
Oh shut up man. Once the police get involved its every man for themself.
Best surprise in my car. A cookie, sliced kiwi and the rest of my margarita. Work is going to be awesome.
Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C.
I just tried to make cleaning gasoline off your shoes with toilet paper in the Chemistry Building bathroom look normal. I failed.
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...
I just compared my relationship to that double ended dong scene from Requiem. This day just took a turn.
So if you wanna come get your pants you can. But you have to come in your boxers. Rules are rules!
Who fucking spams baby shark at a sports bar
Randomize
