this girl ate taco bell on my bed naked last night, it was the sexiest thing ive ever seen
I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
He is like the real live version of the state fair..
My ferret is drunk. Someone told me you'd know what to do?
I still havent given him the valentines day card i got him. I feel like just writting...."sorry for the horrible blow job i gave u last night." and just giving it to him.
Thanks for sticking it out with old horseface last night... I owe you one buddy.
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
Just thought you should know, Im with josh now. Im no longer available for rent. I have a full time tenant now. Like, a year long lease at least.
I just made a drink so ill shit. It's goona be great. Ill tell you about it when you get here. Get pumped. For my shit.
my dad pointed to my full beer and said drink up we're leaving now.
can you adopt me?
She loves introducing her friends to my foreskin.
IM TRYING TO SAY GOODNIGHT STOP FOR LIKE FIVE SECONDS WITH THE DICK SUCKING
Apparently when cookies are around I think of myself as a puppy and reward myself for everything #WhoIsAGoodBoy
My Boss was giving porn recommendations. I think I'm scarred for life.
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
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