these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
This exeeds the amount of high I planned on being.
My phone really needs to stop auto correcting "library" to "ovary".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
He came so hard that he yelled what sounded like a spell from Harry Potter.
Just got a 15 minute lecture from a drag queen about how bisexuality doesn't exist. Cher would be so disappointed in her.
Some dude just said my hair smells like his pillows
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And then you two got up and shouted in near perfect unison "I'M ALWAYS A SLUT FOR BASKIN ROBBINS" The bar just looked at us horrified.
I'M IN A SPINNING VORTEX OF SELF-HATRED AND HORNINESS
I passed out in your bed last night...there maybe a snickers and twix bar under your pillow
I am not even ashamed to say it, I got laid in the stairwell of the hotel, by a 29 year old. It was awesome!
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
my mom is drunk and is trying to get me to take a picture of her ass. what is life?
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