I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
I woke up on the stairs at of a Disneyland hotel. Yes, my night was amazing.
WHAT DO YOU MEAN I DIDN'T APOLOGIZE? THERE WAS A PEACE OFFERING MADE VIA TACO BELL.
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
I made him breakfast and we cuddled on the couch watching march of the penguins, which is, in case you were unaware, the opposite of fucking on a pool table
Just had a tv talk show interview in my mirror. Got into to some pretty heavy shit man, would have made good viewing.
I come back upstairs and she's leaning over sink full of vomit saying 'oh my god it's the chili'
I have the most nasty and explicit wet dreams of my boss that I'm embarrassed to look him in the face. I'd be pregnant or promoted if he only knew
Is it weird that the cop that arrested me called me twice to tell me that I left my ring at the police station
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
my throat is bruised, my back is scarred, my vagina feels like it's going to fall off.. you're like godzilla. you destroy everything.
If I woke up in a pillar of smoke I suppose that's a sign right
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
Oh my God it's like my cock was dipped in lava
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