shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
You should see what I'm doing to your stuffed animals
don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
so he reminded me it was our 9 month anniversary and then said "we could've had a baby by now"
At what point in time did you think it was ok to jizz in my hair while I slept??
Around the time you told me my brothers dick was bigger.
So I cleaned the toilet last night at 2 am and woke up with pink eye. Never doing that again.
I feel like tequila heightens the sense of my nipples.
I should start printing out disclaimer handouts and passing them out to people saying, "I can not be held responsible for anything I say or do this evening."
I'm mortified. After he finished, he turned to me and said,"So, what did you think of my mom?" WTF Please tell me he was not wondering about that while he was going down on me!!!
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
You told him about your cats? I told his friend to put his dick in my mouth, and you talked about cats!?
I washed my sheets. I did out of respect for my previous and current sexual partners.
CURSE YOU AND YOUR SEXY LOGIC
They're the one who can profit the most when given the opportunity for blackmail.
At least that's how I've always seen it whenever I've been the Designated Driver.
That simultaneously explains everything and makes me very very terrified of you.
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
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