Babe! I just farted and I swear to jesus lord christ that it sounded like ur name! Ok, more like Meeatt but still... awesome.
theyre doing shots to celebrate her boob jobs anniversary.
Apparently in gay bars the restroom signs are just a formality. Its a free for all in there
Note to self: do not take so many shots that you sit on the floor under the bar where nobody can see you, and reach out and grab peoples crotch.
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
So like 5 seconds in I realize I knew him in 3rd grade and I went limp in his mouth. It felt like I just murdered the last unicorn ever. Going straight never felt like an option till now.
Worst case scenario, I put a giant cork in your vagina so you don't give birth before my birthday
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
You woke us up at 9:15 am still in your toga from last night saying "welcome to my house party...party". You had already filled up the pong cups with yaager/fireball and ordered a chicken platter... Who even delivered that that early???
Fyi, shaking your genitals at me doesn't count as "trying to have sex".
It's just really funny to hear them talk about March for Life when literally every single one of those girls has had an abortion
Tomorrow I'm going to tape my thumbs to my palms and my biceps to my abdomen to learn what it's like to be a t-rex for a day. Anyone else in?
She can't take shots?!? Literally if I could list that as a skill on a resume I would
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
Randomize
