thanks...oh and i got my period
told you
oh hush
I just made out with a guy for $7.
i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
I feel like i'm in "To Catch a Predator - The Musical"
just saw a girl throwing up in a taco bell nacho cantainor going 60 down the highway
Calling yourself a modern day Geisha doesn't justify being a whore.
Just told him about my threesome. if that doesn't make him want to date me nothing will.
I dare you try and top an Eiffel tower full of Margarita
I'm studying for my midterm by watching porn with Spanish subtitles. Surprisingly the words are still really distracting..
i'm totally cool with all the dick sucking you're doing down there, but as your brother i think i'm supposed to warn you our parents will be home in 5
Is that a polar bear? You seriously grinded with a polar bear at the club?
I'm sitting at dinner with my family looking over sexts. The thirst is far too real. They're talking about retail and I'm like haha, yes, you are all correct.
Oh Jesus our whore days are numbered
I told him I was studying his body for art, so now I have to actually do a drawing of him to not look like a creep and so we can hook up again.
So I was having a really bad night...so I decided to steal a pumpkin.
Randomize
