Moving to Utah. Got sick of alcohol and have a severe wife shortage.
Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
Paddidles count extra in the back of a cop car
I just saw the nastiest chick.
Where?
woke up next to her... fuck you jack daniels, fuck you
I had five suicidal voicemails from him when I woke up this morning. They all started and ended with "DON'T FUCK MY ROOMMATES".
It was only one, it doesn't count.
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
This dude. Just lost. A finger. He asked us for tape.
The gym has a pool
my gym membership just went from "way to get in shape" to "place to go swim when I'm high"
The fairy wings and cowboy hats were not the issue. The bag of cocaine that I held in the air as we drove in the parade might have been.
On a scale of one to liver failure, how bad would it be if I played thunderstruck alone?
the good news is that even if it's Alex's, I can still say it's Colin's, because the kid will come out ginger anyway!
who knew there'd be a plus side to your ginger fetish one day?
Gave her a puke bucket just in case. She filled the bottom of it with tears. Super sad. Although I am super proud she didn't puke. That was a lot of Fireball.
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
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