did we hook up?
no, because you kept repeating "itty bitty titties" when i took off my shirt
She has 2500 facebook friends. I probably should have used a condom.
Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
they duct taped my keg cup to my hand with my sister's phone number on it. I should be ok tonight.
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
you have failed as an in class drinking partner.
I found the bottle of ketchup and sobe you tried to hide in the middle of the lawn last night
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
But you put your finger in my ass and the rest is history
Instead of asking him how many women he's slept with I just got straight to the point and asked how many Plan B pills he's purchased
He forehead kissed me AND THEN asked what I was thinking. I'm taking away his man card.
Blacked out and Irish exited last night. At dinner. On a Sunday.
he was the first penis i touched… i have to go to his shitty bands first gig, i mean come on now
Boys winking, cowboys tipping their hats, old people looking disappointed.... ah, I had forgotten the unholy powers of exposed cleavage!
You are my hero.
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