Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
dude i just made a burrito by wrapping 2 packs of scooby snacks with a fruit roll up. im so high
I just got off a plane from Mexico. At least 15 passengers dashed to the bathroom throughout the flight. Can you tell its spring break?
My cleaning lady just walked in the kitchen and i had a hardcore boner. I dont know what awkward is anymore
This girl would not stay down. It was like night of the living dead. She kept on rising up to haunt anything with a penis
Washing vom off hardwood, so much easier than carpet. Thank you adulthood!
When you awake you'll realize that your car is missing....just know that I had it and becuz of your car I hooked up with the hot bar tender that looks like that guy from bay-watch however I parked it in a loading zone and it was towed...that sex was TOTALLY worth it love you
You don't understand, we were on a waffle house. Both of us were absolutely certain we passed out at his place then BAM! Waffle house.
Please explain why there is a video of you peeing in the Taco Bell bathroom on my phone? Also why did you wink at the end?
I feel like a pile of chihuahua shit that got eaten by a Great Dane who puked it up and then set it on fire.
My hungover walk of shame was interrupted by a stranger on a balcony throwing me a beer to shotgun... at 10 a.m....
She was doing hand motions and used straws from drinks like those airport light batons to have me back my "747 jumbo dick" towards you.
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
so in 24 hours i have gotten caught having sex in my car by a cop, almost burnt off my vag, almost got hit by a semi, and got fired. awesome.
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
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