Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
The way you explained my vagina was exactly the way I would of described my breakfast burrito.
I just lost $50 at the races, got drunk, and woke up to my ex-gf. Apparently the good decisions kept on rolling...
highlight of my day: just saw a crying girl get dropped off at home wearing only socks, booty shorts, and a dirty wifebeeter. I wonder what happened to the costume...
These People Made Expensive Mistakes That They’ll Regret Forever
Jake just asked if thanksgiving was an american thing...I left the table
obviously you don't know the college version of myself. if there's something i'm ALWAYS willing to put up for it's alcohol.
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
Sweet and genuine is kinda lame. I'm more of a bust all over your face and hair kinda guy.
Uhm the hair is off limits bro, conditioner can only go so far.
Bro? You just made it a target.
you had me at cake vodka
Things The Opposite Sex Just Doesn’t Understand
To my wonderful winter break booty calls: thank you for making this holiday season enjoyable. I look forward to seeing you boys again this summer.
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
Bro, she said my penis was the best thing to happen to her mouth since teeth.
what the hell makes you think you get to decide what your going to wear at our weding!?
Sometimes intelligent conversation doesn't mix well with a romantic interest. It's possible the two are best kept separate. Toys should just stay in the toy box.