I feel like our bond as friends is a lot stronger now that I've talked to you on the phone while having sex.
I have a fruit stripe tattoo on my penis. You're the only person I know who chews that gum.
i have a real life question, do ur boyfriends pretend to be vampires ever?
He leaned in to kiss me and I dodged him but i fell on the floor. I guess I never got up cuz I woke up on the floor and he was in his bed
Here’s Everything Coming To Netflix This July
Well, I looked over and you and him were each making out with a fireman. And then you switched. And you probably spent an hour like that.
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
He got me a cake that said " Congratulations on the dick "
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
19 Of The Creepiest (Most Inexplicable) Things People Experienced
I broke my foot jumping out of YOUR window under YOUR watch. You failed me drunk guardian. You failed.
After we finished, she peed a little on my chest and told me she was "marking her territory". I didn't know if I should have been scared or aroused.
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
so then the cop took one last hit off our blunt and then drove off in his car and we just all stood there thinking, yea... that just happened...
Just spilled beer all over my bed. Should cut myself off, but instead I just took my shirt off and used it as a towel.
he asked if he should bring the trash can into the room.. apparently i shoved my finger all over his face and said.. shhhh dont talk... just take your pants off.