she was seriously choking and the whole time all he kept saying was "that's what she said"
I'm also annoyed at my horoscope for not warning me of my perils
Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
Goldfish can't live in a bowl filled with tequila, lesson learned.
These 25 People Believed Fake Facts For Way Too Long
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
I feel like shaving is just admitting i'm gonna do him, even though im still on the fence
shave. it'll take 10 min. Better safe than hairy.
Experimentation with dessert toppings followed by shower sex. Only logical progression bro.
Also, I think I'm too drunk to be at the gym right now. But how sober do you need to be for IM volleyball?
There's a man in a pumpkin/reaper outfit advertising a new head shop outside the Taco Bell. I love this town.
23 Adults Confess The Irrational Fears They Had When They Were Kids
Happy Thanksgiving! Hope its not too awkward that your dad and your boyfriend are the same age.
first thing my tuition money buys is a strap on
I threw up in the darkest corner of the bar last night, then watched 2 girls freak out in disgust after walking through it. I then realised I puked on the dancefloor, took a picture and proceeded to send it to my mom.
I think you're my mermaid sister. Separated at birth, by sea.
I'm gonna tell the medical examiner that your cause of death was over-arousal.
That's crazy. Wow that lady must be fucked up
Yeah I hope she's okay.
I'm still going to fuck her husband but I do hope she's okay.