The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
i would rather give Shaq a handjob than take this accounting final
If you start sounding at all like you're even remotely in love, expect a lecture on the merits of being a single woman with a vibrator.
This is why we're friends.
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
i just peed with my friends in your backyard... do you still live here
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
Do you remember Kelly my alter personality? She talked like a man and would sing amazing grace?
If 26 stitches didn't sober her up, nothing will.
We could make it cute. Like "oh those two cute lesbians who are about five foot two who sell the cocaine down the street. You know the ones? With the Yorkies?"
New year means new boundaries for the Brazilian lady.. I'm pretty sure I got wax on my asshole
Then he shook the next streetlight but this one broke and fell over. He told me, "This is the part where we run."
note: just because the casino is called bourbon street, it doesn't mean you can puke and keep walking and no one will care. chalk me up for another 86
I mean, I would have, but I couldn't come up with a logical reason to bring up oral sex during an orientation.
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
You're just upset because I have cupcakes and boobs and you don't.
Randomize
