so i woke up to her 8 year old asking for a bowl of cereal...
Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
Its like everytime i see you, my vagina gets a heartbeat.
woke up this morning to find the entire staircase covered in marinara sauce, with my roommate practically sobbing and scrubbing the wall with carpet cleaner.
I scrubbed the bathroom, smoked a bowl, and gave myself 3 orgasms. If the world ends today, I feel accomplished.
Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
He has in a pan: ten pieces of bacon, two cloves of garlic, an egg (not scrambled or hard boiled, just an egg) and frozen corn.
I just masturbated to a Jock Jams cd. What have you done today?
The best part of last night was the women's softball game on the TV at the strip club
At 27 it's no longer called 'slutty', it's called having a healthy sex life...
there's a girl on facebook trying to buy me a pizza. I can't say no... right?
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
I just did the walk of shame in monkey slippers in the snow
Teach me the song of your people
Randomize
