I can't believe the cop was so cool about the whole thing, I mean, I had man mayo all over my jeans.
why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
We need to buy some popsicles so we can remind ourselves we're good at this.
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
Just ate a whole pizza by myself. Wearing my indian headdress again. its really cool with the french braids. I look like fucking pocahontas or some shit.
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
He's against "violent sex" cause apparently my body is "sacred". Like dude I'm about to tell you about blowing your brother just so you'll fuck me like an animal Jesus Christ....
Did you know that if you chase vodka with cheap red wine it tastes exactly like college alcoholism?
I'm going to bed early so football can come sooner
I chatted up the pastor's son on Grindr during the service. Still ridiculing my decision to go to church this morning?
I just had a random tinder dude give me a ride home from school because my car is dead. Tinder rules! It's like Uber, but with boys who want to impress you.
I just started an apology with "so I'm sorry about throwing the Brita at your head last night..."
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
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