i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
it took me 2 minutes to realize that it wasn't HER hand on my penis. First, and worst threesome ever..
This Xanax laced vodka tonic will help me forget that all these spring breakers are all young enough to have been my students.
I just got released from jail. still in my kilt. bring pants damnit. they won't understand.
pants will make it better? really?
all i could think about while he was eating me out was how pretty his eyelashes were
That chick went from zero to shitshow in only 6 shots.
I just got carded by a ten year old.
The problem is drunk me is completely unaware how poor I am
We may have picked the wrong resort. Brenna and I have already been propositioned for swinging twice and we've only been here 3 hours
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
Remember that time we turned a can of Axe body spray into a flame thrower?
The awkward moment when you're leaving the most attractive guy you've ever been with and you're trying not to shit on yourself. Fucking welcome to my life
Judging from the sharpie on my face, glitter on my chest and women's tiger print panties i'm wearing last night was a thing.
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
Randomize
