once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
Lauren will drop me off I'll be drunk ride you for a little bit and then you can go to sleep
sorry. that wasn't for you
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
this is not the time for floating mt dew and shots of tequila.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
Currently shopping online for cardboard cutouts of various horror characters. That should teach me roommates to stop taking acid on Tuesdays.
In the last 3 months, I've slept with an ex,someone single, someone in a relationship, someone married, and someone divorced. I should get some type of grown up girl scouts badge.
Dude we both faced 40s of steel reserve which is like saying, "Hey, I'm a complete piece of shit!"
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
I changed his contact info to "NO" and a picture of satan
It's your birthday, you should get to jizz where you want to. Jizz when you want tooo
Have you ever wondered if we are just made up characters in someone's head? You'll have to forgive me right now I think I have 7 thumbs
when i woke up w mysterious sticky crap in my hair, i assumed i had another blackout hookup. nope. turns out i made PBJ and proceeded to pass out in it. i ate the evidence when i woke up.
no no no no you can't just say your dirtiest secret is "i sat on goldfish by accident once" and just leave i have QUESTIONS
AT LEAST TELL ME IF THE GOLDFISH WAS STILL IN A BOWL??????????????
Randomize
