Today at work while talking to my co-worker we both realized at the same time that last year I had a one night stand with his roommate and he was in the living room drinking coffee when I did the walk of shame. YAY.
I hope the kids appreciate the fact that I jizzed on her instead of on their slide.
The sex was so good, I called my ex during the 2nd time just so he could hear. Is that mean?
A guy in a big stork costume just came to our meeting to give us condoms and t-shirts telling us not to get pregnant. Only at college
i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
I dunno what he did but it both burns and feels amazing to pee
I saw pigeons eating ur dried up puke today. Last night was fucking great
Update: tequila girl had her hand down groomsmen pants
Dude just walked up to me, gave me his number and said, if this number ever calls its my penis,better keep that one handy. I cant lie its the best pick up line ever, im calling his penis.
I woke up in his closet, with my shirt inside out and backwards, Rolos in my hand, a tortilla with a face carved into it stuck to the fridge with a magnet, a homemade bong next to the bed, and the door off the hinges... I need a chaperone.
Spencer just told me I got home and was opening beers with my teeth and trying to make pot butter
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
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