no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
oh no you fucking didn't eat my mac and cheese you cunt
I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
You convinced me that eggnog and rum is a great moisturizer.
why did you let me tell everyone that you can get herpes from the ice luge and then let me do the ice luge?
I need you to stand in the corner and ref this threesome. Wear stripes.
Woke up to a break up text for a facebook relationship I didn't even know I was in... 2012 is going to be a good year
Her desktop wallpaper is a collage of penises she fucked.
They were scared I was going to get lost last night so they dressed me up as Waldo so someone would always find me.
Directions to your booty call: go down the part of Route 66 that has all the car dealerships, motels and bad decisions, go past the Christian college and turn left at the Children's Center.
Sorry, fell into some ass. Call you tomorrow.
I could tell you were slightly drunk by the time you started having a conversation with my tiki torch
Kick open the door, strike a pose, steal a boyfriend, end scene.
So nothing to worry about, but i'm probly going to jail soon, just thought i should let you know so you didn't worry. Bye!
Coffee and girl scout cookies. Breakfast of champions.
Get fucked.
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