Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
Last night I walked out of the bar got in a cab asked the cabi to circle the block. he did and brought me right back to the bar. I paid him $7 thanked him and walked back into the bar.
Dude its so hot it my room I can't jack off. Its gonna be a long summer.
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
Maybe I'll just get really drunk on valentines day and tell him I think his penis is small
Dear America, sometimes I miss your Everclear and its consequences.
Brandon's Recipe: two parts cocoa, one part sugar, one part milk, two parts four, 378 parts paranoia. Thanks for the fucking brownies, bitch.
I'm working on a search warrant...can u pick up box of Chardonnay...I'll give u cash when u get here...
Yea... I love that ur a prosecutor and drink box wine
I don't know about this Sanders guy after all. I'm voting for MYSTERY BABYLON, WHORE OF ALL THE EARTH
Hillary?
Open the door and I will lure them out to freedom with viagra and candy orange slices. You know they love that shit.
I'm not in bed, I'm driving and puking at the same time.... first for everything
His mom came while we were asleep naked and started asking me about my plans after high school... Is that even a thing.
I threw a lamp at you?
Yes, yes you did.
Awesome
Randomize
