You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
I seriously fake cumming more than i poop.
did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
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Manscaping on you would be like trying to clean up the oil spill with a dixie cup.
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
Dude, somewhere around here makes 4loko slushies. I just decided coming home isn't so bad.
They both just did a shot, head butted each other, did another shot and then slapped each other in the face. These could be the two guys we've been looking for all our lives
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Should have know they were on something when he started filling a Togo container with fruit
the bar didnt serve shots so jim ordered us jaeger neat. it worked.
So glad the long weekend is over so I can bring this bender to a merciful end.
I was walking out of the bar when he said I'll see you later and I said I'll see you in my dreams and then fell face first and broke my nose
While we were doing it he looked up at me and said "Does your husband fuck you this good?" Talk about a mood killer....
I've seen too many naked penises for this to be a normal Monday morning
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