He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
I just put a condom on my dildo so i wouldng get another uti....most depresIng moment of.my LIFE
Just saw someone tackle someone else to the ground for their coors light; he's not getting back up.
Yea, now that Irene is hitting us stores aren't selling any alcohol; beer is now a precious commodity.
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
It's ok that you're screwing someone else while trying to get back with me, I'm banging three girls while I ignore you.
He wanted to bang in the work van while we were on shift together. He convinced me with "It's like the Scooby Doo van but looks nothing like the Scooby Doo van."
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
If I got everything I wanted in the world, I would have been forcing soup down your throat hours ago
I've been there a week.. I'd rather all my coworkers not know that I'm already sleeping with my boss.
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
There's no sexy way to moan the name Ernest. Or Ernie. This relationship is fucked
PSA- Wearing assless chaps results in embarrassingly painful sunburn
She's currently singing "I'm gonna keep on lovin you" to her pillow. How do you think tonight went?
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
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