Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
i might have gotten away with it if "don't tase me bro!" wasn't the first thing i said when i rolled down my window.
Just found two Xanax on the floor at the tanning bed. And yes, Im taking them...looks like going to get cancer is paying off
I wish real life had facebook tags so i could figure out who all these people are
can you pick me up an extra syllabus
i passed out in the shower again
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
Nick just found a baggie of 3 year old shrooms in his desk drawer and downed it all with cheap white wine. I am not on vomit duty tonight.
I think the waitress doesn't beleive I have friends coming. I've had 4 drinks and a large salad just waiting for you guys.
It looks like the misc $300 credit card fraud might have been our taxi cab driver who wouldn't take boobs as payment. No wonder...
Things I learned last night: 1. Bacardi 151 is a one-way ticket to the toilet, 2. It is possible for a human being to turn into Mount Vesuvius
You were discovered in a bush, smoking, and singing "in the jungle" to yourself. Which explains the scratches, but not the orange paint.
I'm eating a subway sandwich in the bathtub because I don't want to move. God bless boys from Brooklyn
can you please not set my house on fire for once???
Well as if this year didn't suck enough already, I can now count 2015 as the year I got chlamydia
So is it weird that I am super excited for my new captain america clit ring... Or is my crotch getting too patriotic
Randomize