if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
I think I've hugged the toilet more times than I've hugged my own family members.
I haven't seen him since I gave him a hand job in the hospital. I like to think I contributed to his speedy recovery.
No no don't get confused. We do chemistry homework on Thursdays. We screw on Fridays. Other than that, Words With Friends is our only communication five days a week. We are NOT dating.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At least your night didn't end with three cops seeing your ass and you sitting on the ground in a wig throwing your shoes at people
Oh my god he's laying on a longboard singing the song from cool runnings.
I like how zombie Abe Lincoln and hooking up with a girl were on your same thought process.
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found out his moms name, maiden name, profession, and office location, his dads name and profession, his home phone, picture of their house, all of his work profiles, and the cost of their house. All I'm trying to do is find his damn twitter
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
Ugh. The fucking vaginal recession is so real right now.
lol I'll trade you jello for a tampon
what a trade!
he's so sweet and its so cute. but I swear to fuck if I let my guard down and this was all a lie I am going to become a serial killer.
Who put the toilet in the living room? This is extremely inconvenient right now.
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