Bea Arthur died yesterday
You shut your stupid mouth
Betty White is next, I just know it.
Betty White will never die! She's like Dick Clark. Rue McCalahan is next.
Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
he knocked over the vodka and juice...picks up the cup and says "yes", takes the last sip...doesnt even worry about the mess all over the floor and we continue having sex.
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
I have her designated blowjob hair tie on my wrist. It's like a key to eternal happiness
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
I sexy timed too hard and there is an ass shaped piece of a ping pong table now missing bc of it. How am I allowed to leave the house without a helmet?
You slammed your forties down on the table and yelled "I AM EDWARD FORTYHANDS" then mumbled something about repping Idaho like a champ and laid down on the couch.
i just want to be sober by dinner like is that too much to ask
him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
I went home with him again and he LEFT HIS OWN HOUSE at 2 in the morning while I was IN THE BATHROOM.
You KNOW it was a good night when you find French fries AND taco remnants in your bra when you get home...
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
Randomize