im surrounded by empty glasses of chocolate milk WTF
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
I'm getting very mixed reviews. One friend told me to stop drinking bc the last 3 times he's heard from me I've either peed my pants, been throwing up, or people have been having sex beside me.
Strangely enough I'm encouraging you to keep drinking for all the same reasons.
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
#1 benefit of having an equality sticker on my car: some girl flashed me while i was driving home
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
Found a girl that was gonna make out with 25 people for her 25th birthday. I was like #12. Made top half!
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
On a scale of one to liver failure, how bad would it be if I played thunderstruck alone?
Based on my body hair location, my ancestors had very cold hamstrings and very warm chests
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
After we had sex he gave me a thumbs up... fucking A&M Aggies, man
I kept falling all over the place and yelled at the bouncer you can't kick me out I'm from Texas.
Apparently I told him the people made me order taco bell I didn't even want it. And then proceeded to turn off all the lights and sit at the kitchen table in the dark and told him not to look at me.
so I just realized.. of my 70k student loan debt, most of it went toward bar tabs, eightballs, and sweet-ass ties to wear to gamedays and other people's weddings. I think about shit like this while I'm at my mid-level management position. you know. "working."
Look upon your future, America, and despair.
Randomize
