This girl is more easily done than said...
I'm seriously so bored I'm seeing how many rooms I can masturbate in before I get caught.
Four. Poor grandma...
So she comes up to me at the end of the night and asks me if I going to take her home and fuck her. I pretty much had to right?
you had an obligation.
i keep forgetting that not all of my female friends are bisexual.
I am not one to point fingers but since it says your name "wuz here" next to the dick drawn on my stomach I am holding you personally responsible.
He told everyone he was going inside...an hour later we get a knock on the garage door from some dude telling us a guy is passed out on the lawn and we should get him inside because it's about to rain
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
I am a human short and spout . Here is my jager Herr is my redbull . When i get real drink i shout out. Tip me over and pour yeager out
Ask him about a girl named Meg then give a disappointed and disapproving face.
Lots of alcohol. 3rd graders fuck me now.
Auto correct or actual 3rd graders?
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
I consider my hand a solid 5. So if I'm dipping below a 7.5, I might as well go with old faithful.
You know what? The sex was so bad that I don't even care that I gave him strep.
Well Jon got a DUI sleeping in the back seat so I thought the trunk was safer. BUT WHO CARES WHY JUSE PLEASE COME LET ME OUT!
Randomize
