the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
I just used a franzia box to scrape the snow off my car.
I just tried to sell my homemade "lightning bolt stencil for pubes" on Etsy.
Hypothetical question: If a guy wanted to watch you fuck me, would you be willing to take a long lunch break on Wednesday?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In all seriousness...vodka, almond milk and chocolate syrup make a decent white russian.
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
He came for an unexpected visit and let's just say I shattered his illusion that girls don't watch porn
I just saw a commercial for God of War and heard the nickname he gave my vagina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have grass duct taped all over my body
Stalker pic that shit
He left, I think he got uncomfortable when I started singing 'oompah oompah doodley do, I have a special riddle for you'
We haven't been trashed enough to shut down a bar together in four days. I'm starting to worry that we're growing apart.
I just sent my ex off to a party, threw a condom at him, and told him to make good choices.
Just got road head. In broad daylight. On the interstate. During rush hour. Pushing the envelope one public bj at a time.
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
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