Who knew there were guys that wanted to only stalk you instead of date you? Count on me to find them!
btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
You kno how some people just need a "everything will be alright" pat on the back? I need an "everything will be alright" blowjob right now. Come over
I was taking a bath while he walked in, sat down on the toilet, and said "its like a baby, I can see it crowning."
DC is easy, you will figure it out.
I'm drunk and blonde. You are wayyyy underestimating this.
it was like fucking a Mumford & Sons song
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I walked into her room to find her sitting on the end of her bed with her heads in her hands talking to herself. She kept muttering things like "What? How? No. What? I don't --- How?" $10 says she's pregnant.
I'll see to your $10 and raise you $40.
I just licked a piece of cheese off my phone screen if that makes you feel any better
I NEED TO TAKE A FUCKING BREAK. MY VAGINA IS SMOKING.
There's a rash on my genitals that would like a word with you.
He named his newborn baby after a character in the Hobbit and that is literally keeping me up at night.
Fucking a younger guy is now a game of odds. The chance that he gives me corona virus is outweighed by the evening of orgasms I know he’ll give me.
Randomize