They have to be talking about me. I never heard that statement until I was born.
It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
I was riding her and she yelled "fuck me" then someone in the room next door yelled "you don't have to say it if youre doing it."
my mom found me passed out in the kitchen floor with the Brita pitcher.. Happy Mothers Day
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
My costume for the end of the world party was a success. Everyone in the ER thought I was there because I got hit by a car when it was actually from alcohol poisoning.
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
I've replaced you with thin mints and masturbation
Have you seen him ? Seriously. No one is that straight.
do you think your dog feels awkward being in the background of your nudes?
He called my vagina his wife... how is that NOT creepy?!
I DEMAND FORESKIN
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
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