This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
Miracle whip is the devil's jizz.
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
Fucking him was like shopping for my first training bra.. Embarrassing yet extremely useful
I just sent a friend request to someone saying that i was the girl he shared a fifth of jager with last week. Thats something special. He better accept.
At least you got some premium homework time. Still drinking vodka from a coffee cup?
I switched to water. When the numbers get blurry you are no longer being productive.
My first drink last night was a 2-liter of jameson and coke. So hung over it hurt to put my pants back on
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
Yes but from my experience being high around your own baby makes you feel like the worst kind of mom
I feel like the way dolphins mate would be the approach that a guy would have to use in order for you to sleep with them
Jusy read on a science page that squeezing boobs can prevent cancer cells from forming in them, youre welcome.
I wore a bird inflatable and still got laid. So there's that.
Dear Jesus. Send me strength to not suck cock this morning.
I forgot to ask you how long you're housesitting. By which I mean how many bones can I get in averaging 2.5 bones per day.
20.
Hey bro are you still alive??? I'm sure you are wondering how you ended up laying on the floor at the foot of your bed and why there is a wheelchair by your door....
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