whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
went out last night and woke up on the bathroom floor again, thinking about just moving my bed in there.
so my daughter wakes me up this morning and i feel like a vibration so im thinking she has my phone..nope my vibrator
we literally spent four hours convincing you that all 5 of your toes were there. no more everclear on a tuesday.
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
Have you ever stopped and thought "I do NOT want to be inside of this person right now. Or ever." Because you should.
I'll be in SoCal at my bachelorette party, aka embracing a fireman covered in KY and chocolate shavings.
HIS BALLS ARE HEAVEN SENT FROM THE VELVET ANGLES.
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
the girl whose rug I peed on is here
I think all three of us just need to suck it up and go to lunch with him to keep our bar tab down
Enjoy the penises
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
I had to fake it. He was punching my vagina like it owed him money and enough was enough.
Excuse me. I’m a mature responsible adult.
You got your arm stuck in a vending machine trying to get fruit snacks.
I had a cast on my hand and if I paid for my fruit snacks, I’m getting my fruit snacks.
Randomize
