Goddamnit I hate your level headedness
everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
I'm covered in egg mcmuffin wrappers and my room smells like dead hooker.
It's times like this I miss having my nipples pinched
There's hot sauce all over my mirror, lamp shade and dresser. Also it's your turn for weed
No judgement. Sometimes you gotta twerk on a legends face.
I found my limit. I will not, in fact, blow my 78 year old professor for an A in his class.
Cause I'll toss Tabasco sauce in his eyes and yell "Cobra attack" and walk away
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
I just gave myself a foot massage. #SingleAsFuck
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
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