if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
i wanted a birthday blowjob. not a birthday VD.
you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
He used his penis as a puppet and sang Rihanna's Hard..... so no, we will never see each other again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Note to self: Not getting laid all weekend makes girls in mondays classes racks seem enormously bigger.
so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
i think the bruises are from the grocery store. on separate occasions. i've been spending a lot of time drunk at the market lately.
i have a vague recollection of being in the parking deck around 4 this morning, and on monday morning i was naked on the roof.
that would mean it's on tape
Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
Time for jim to play the "dont seriously consider pooping in the trash" game
It's blow job season.
He cried & told me I reminded him off his mother. I don't want to talk about it. I want to drink about it.
Never admit to being cold at those things. That is how you end up waking up the next morning naked under animal pelts... or so I have heard.
i have officially smoked myself stupid. went to wally world to buy soap and toothpaste but got 4 potpies and 2 dessert pies instead. fail.
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