and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
the people of mcdonalds are all starring at me & this dude like they know we just slept together
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
Note to self: never do anything I don't want to explain to a paramedic
I'll be there in 5 min. If not, read this again.
Howd you meet this guy?
I found him next to my pants on sunday morn.
You got cut off after you tried to make the dog funnel moscato.
Do you think kicking my coke habit is a good personal goal to put down on the evaluation form?
Everyone keeps telling me I look so healthy and happy today: the power of the penis people!!
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
Can u pick me up? Lost my keys.
Sure. FYI- you "lost" them on the roof, trying to throw them over the house.
At 3:00am my whole house started smelling like cooking meat. I have no idea why she thought it was a good idea to crock-pot a WHOLE turkey that early in the morning.
Tonight’s your last chance for a danger free blowjob.
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