That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
this girl and her friend just showed up at my house. standing together, theylook exactly like the number 10. this has cockblock written alllllll over it.
what do 4 police cars, 1 ambulence, and 2 fire truycks have in common?.... My driveway
i woke up at 5 am and found myself wrapped in christmas lights that were plugged into the wall.
The only thing better than Call of Duty is getting jerked off while playing Call of Duty.
I'm either watching Fifth Element or Hotel Rwanda. There's black people and white people and high life tall boy 18 packs are $11.99 so I could be watching my own hand. I have no idea.
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
She has a lazy eye!
My other option is a hardwood floor
I left your tip in your mailbox. Last night was amazing.
Guys, as my favorite vagina consultants I have to share something.
My professional advice is not to put lemons in your lady pocket.
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
I have this theory that your highest awareness of how drunk you are is while you're sitting on a toilet
is it bad that I'm more worried about having to take out my piercings than the fact that I might be having a kid
Maybe singing about how you'd bang Morgan Freeman to the tune of Single Ladies while holding champagne and a box of Cheerios wasn't the best first impression on his parents
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
Randomize
