Driving with balloons in your car is more annoying than that bubble fart that doesn't leave your ass after your previous fart.
seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
I just had someone call me out on a walk of shame via megaphone
I love family holidays its the only time when playing beer pong, and smoking hookah with my family isnt looked down upon
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He taught me how to drive a stick by using his dick. He even made the whurrrr noise so I knew when to change gears.
Drinking with a woman who gave an anti-drugs speech at my high school. Somehow, not surprised.
Lots of alcohol last night skiing this morning = me throwing up off chairlift
So neither of us had a dollar bill and we couldnt find a straw so we spent all nite doing coke through penne pasta
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
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I may or may not have just hot boxed a backhoe on the construction site of a police station that's being rebuilt..
At this point, if I'm not getting fucked by a man in ONLY cowboy boots, it's not worth it.
Two days later and my throat is still sore. That bong is a double edged sword.
I feel awkward giving career advice while naked
The power of my boobs compel you
I was high as fuck laying down in the back seat while she gave him head. Most awkward chill moment of my life.
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