imagine if the morning after your status automatically updated with the name of the person you hooked up with
well i had to explain to their mom why the kids i babysit for won't stop repeating the phrase "nice juicy guido"
I asked her if she wanted to make this a permanent exclusive thing instead of a fuck buddy thing, and she just looked at me like I'm an idiot.
That's because you are an idiot.
It was like she tried to cover up all the weight she gained with a fake tan...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
Be proud. You give fat lesbians everywhere shower-nozzle worthy material for weeks on end.
The last time I thought I had a UTI, I ended up having herpes. Sooo.. This time in preparing myself for cancer or death.
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
...and as she's going down on me I look at the speedo and I'm doing 15 under, with 6 cars tailgating me, and I know her parents saw her head pop up because they were the car right behind us.
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
Summary of my night: made out with a complete stranger at a club dressed in the Geico gecko costume...
I haven't seen her in probably 3 months and when she showed up wasted to my house she promptly pulled out her tit
I got pull-out-my-nuvaring-drunk last night.
My mom is worried I'm not eating enough protein so she's sending me 48 cans of tuna. That's not a typo.
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