hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
we were dressed as cave people and he kept telling everybody i was so easy a caveman could do it.
You asked the dj to play 'who let the dogs out" because it was your birthday. You left the bar and then re-entered to the song
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
You said you couldnt get the condom on but "its the thought that counts"
We decided to play beer pong where the loser had to beer bong a pitcher of beer...people just started losing on purpose. It was a bad idea.
Just so we're clear, that's a yes to the honey, but if you get marshmallow fluff anywhere near my body we are never doing this again
He says I tipped the waitress ten dollars because she "smelled like pigs in a blanket."
It made me think of you cause he just screamed "CAPTAIN PLANET" a lot and kicked people in the balls.
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
Hey. My eyes swollen shut and I can't find my shoes. How was your night?
5 minutes Isn't even long enough to bring me even close to an orgasm. How selfish. Think about baseball and fuck me you idiot.
I got there and she was on her balcony drinking out of a bottle of vodka and smoking a cigar.
Randomize